I don’t do everything.
I have come to the realization that I can’t do everything. And, even more, that I shouldn’t do everything. For years I held an unrealistic view of myself, my abilities, and what I could do.
So I pushed myself hard. Too hard. I expected a lot of myself. Too much. And I found myself overwhelmed, unhappy, and burnt out.
So, I decided that I would focus on a few things and try to do them well. I kept on narrowing and narrowing that list until it became my small list of core competencies. On my list were: my faith, my family, teaching, and writing. That’s it.
Because I know my limitations and my narrow focus, I have to laugh a bit when people ask me, “How do you do it all?” I know the truth: there are so many things (many wonderful things) that I just don’t do. But, I’m ok with that.
Should I Share My Schedule?
Lately several readers have been asking about my schedule. How do I organize my day so that I can focus on these priorities? I have been reluctant to share for a few reasons:
- Everyone’s lives are different, and what works for one person may not for someone else.
- I know how frequently I “mess up” my schedule and have to find new ways to make things work.
- And, honestly, I’m a bit scared to share. What if people think my schedule is too easy? That I don’t spend enough time with my kids? with my husband? That I’m not spiritual enough? etc.
However, I know that I often find inspiration when others are honest about their struggles. I’ve gleaned some great ideas by finding out how ordinary people structure their days. So….
One Work Outside the Home Mom’s Schedule
Mornings
(I’ve shared more about my morning routine and how changing my mornings changed my life.)
5:30 a.m.
Wake up
Morning Prayers by myself
Get ready
10 minutes of writing on the book I am currently working on
Start a load of laundry
6:00 a.m.
Get kids up
Breakfast together
Move load of laundry
Morning Prayers as a family in the icon corner
6:30 a.m.
Leave with Sister and Little Brother
Drop children off at preschool
Arrive at school
7:00 a.m.
Work in my classroom on a blog post
7:30 a.m. – 3:00 p.m.
Teach reading to some fantastic 7th graders!
During some of my breaks I write comments on other blogs and follow my Pinterest strategy for my blog
3:00 p.m.
Depending on the day of the week I will either:
Go on a run (2-4 miles)
Attend a meeting (the joys of being a teacher!)
Tutor students in our After School Program
4:00 p.m.
Leave school and pick up children
Go home
Play with kids
Make supper (often a crock pot meal, so I just add a salad or another side dish)
5:00 p.m.
Eat supper as a family
Evening Prayers as a family
Clean up and make lunches for the next day
Play with Children
Baths
6:00 p.m.
Little Brother (age 2) goes to bed (find out Why Our Children Go to Bed Ridiculously Early)
Read with Sister and Big Brother
6:30 p.m.
Sister (age 3) goes to bed
Help Big Brother with homework
7:00 p.m.
Big Brother (age 6) goes to bed
Work on the blog (writing and editing posts, adding images, writing guest posts, social media, Elite Blog Academy class and assignments)
9:00 p.m.
Time with my husband
9:30
Get ready for bed
Read Bible (I’m reading through the Old Testament this year)
Go to sleep
Some Explanation
This is a typical weekday schedule. The weekends are dedicated to family and church. I work on my book and blog during nap time (we have a mandatory quiet time from 12-2 for all family members) and from 7-10 in the evenings.
You may have wondered when my husband is home, or how he helps out with this schedule. Because he is in the intense dissertation-writing stage of his doctoral program, his schedule is a big less predictable. He generally tries to be home for supper and spends much of the weekends with us. While not ideal, we realize that it is the way of this season of our lives.
You will notice that there are many things that I don’t do.
–We don’t enroll our kids in a lot of after school activities and enrichment programs. It just wouldn’t fit our weeknight schedules. Big Brother is involved in two sports per year, however, that have weekend practices and games. He also takes swimming lessons during the summers.
–I don’t make gourmet meals. I use my crock pot a TON and other nights make very simple suppers.
–I don’t have other hobbies outside of writing, reading, and running–so no time spent crafting, etc.
–I am not involved in my son’s PTA, on charity boards, or other organizations that have weeknight meetings. I teach Church school and help chant at our church–both of which can be done on Sundays.
However, by realizing that I can’t do everything, I can focus on the things that I want to do. And, it brings me much energy, joy, and a sense of purpose. Superwoman I am not, but a happy, hard-working mom I am.
What does a typical day look like for you? Are there some things that you’ve said “no” to so that you can focus on others?
The Best Resource to Help You
Would you like to have stress-free mornings this upcoming school year? Do you want to learn how to create your own evening and morning routines that will help you eliminate the crazy and focus on the productive?
Crystal Paine, of Money Saving Mom, has created two amazing courses that I have used and loved. In fact, pretty much everything I have learned about homemaking routines has come from her!
Crystal’s courses are called Make Over Your Mornings and Make Over Your Evenings, and I do not exaggerate when I say that they will change your life. Because of them, I was able to create a peaceful atmosphere in my house, find time to start a blog, and write two books. Talk about life-changing!
Simply click HERE to find out more about this deal and the courses themselves. You can even see the first lesson for free! There is also a money-back guarantee, so you literally have nothing to lose.
When you do, I’d love to hear about your experience. Let me know what you think!
(This post contains affiliate links. If you click through and purchase a product, I will receive a small commission at no additional cost to you. Thank you for supporting The Orthodox Mama.)
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I love it that your kids go to bed early. My son is 14 and goes to bed between 8:30-9 depending on when he needs to be up the next day. This is way earlier than most of his friends and kids I know his age go to bed. I feel like not only do my husband and I need at least an hour of time just the two of us, but also our son needs a good night sleep. Kids have so much to do between school and activities I want him to be able to fully recharge at night.
I completely agree! I teach middle school students, and I am amazed at how late most of them stay up at night. Studies show that kids who are chronically sleep deprived exhibit similar symptoms as those of ADHD. They also perform 2 grade levels lower than their aptitude. My kids will definitely go to bed early!
Hey Sarah! Its interesting to see others people’s schedules…as I’m reading it all, I’m wondering how on earth does she do everything so quickly! What takes you 30 minutes seems to take me 2 hours..=P Sooo, when and how do you get all your reading done?! I must know! Haha
Hi Ciara! Great question on the reading. I do a LOT of my reading at school. My kids read 20 minutes each day, and I often read alongside them (when I’m not conferencing with them about their reading). So, that’s 20 minutes per class period = 80 minutes per day. I also will read some evenings. And, I take one day completely off from blogging and social media, and my favorite thing to do that day is—read!
I am a stay at home mom who doesn’t do everything either! I get the same comments, “How do you do it all?!” I don’t, really! I would love to learn and do more but like you must prioritize. Thanks for sharing!
You’re welcome, Jessica! And, prioritizing is definitely a must. For me it’s helpful to realize, as well, that what is a priority now may change in another season of life. Right now when our kids are little, I’m going to enjoy this calmer, more relaxed phase!
We just had our second child and I’m preparing to return to work right as my husband is deploying so I’ve been searching for schedules that work for others. This helps so much. It’s already similar to my previous schedule and I don’t feel so bad now that I don’t cook gourmet or have time for many hobbies.
What a busy time for you, Jamie. I pray that you have a good transition back to work and that you have a good support group around you as your husband is deployed.